Letting Go

My entire life is one of hanging tightly onto things, as if I may be able to control the variables which shape my destiny. I would not dare to let go, lest I plunge my life into an uncontrollable abyss.

I have a big problem! I have a control issue, as psychology diagnoses.

To be honest, there is very little I can do to control the uncontrollable in life.

Besides, control is illusionary. Only the Maker of heaven and earth has absolute and sovereign control of things and events on earth.

Life is not an exact science that one may manipulate the variables to bring about a formulaic desired outcome.

Though largely predicated on principles of cause-and-effect, sowing-and-reaping, “the Law of the Farm”, and natural laws of physics, life is a giant human billiards games where one life interacts with another in shaping the course of one’s life, a day at a time.

In other words, life is excitingly unpredictable and hopelessly uncontrollable.

When I hang on tightly to things and become entrenched in stagnant positions of thinking, feeling and living in a vain attempt to exercise control, I am basically a stick in the mud, too afraid to live life as one big adventure, with both pleasant and jolting surprises.

The ultimate irony is: my failure to let go would result in being held captive by self-induced anxiety.

The more I am anxious about controlling my destiny, the more out of control I feel. I live under the weight of not having (an illusionary) control that never existed anyway.

This is where faith in a sovereign and loving God comes into my billiards game of life: “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)

King David’s advice resonates with my heart: “When anxiety was great within me, Your consolation brought joy to my soul.” (Psalm 94:19)

I shall resolve, from this moment forward, to “be still and know” that He is God (Psalm 46:10), and He is in total control of my life.

I must invite Him, the Author of Life, to co-write the remaining chapters of my life story so that it may be His story.